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Why We Should Disown Guam:
by: Dr. Robert Gerzofki

The Territory of Guam is located in South Pacific Asia. It is one of many islands pushing our forces out into the Pacific Ocean over Australia. The island has a long history of outside colonialism. This started in the late 17th century with a series of attempts to convert the natives to Catholicism. The Spanish eventually settled there for a few hundred years. The island was then taken by our nation during the Spanish-American war of 1898. Other than a short time when it was occupied by Japan it has stayed a burden to our country.

Guam has a history of turbulence within American society. Unruly aground sailors stop in for quick shore leaves. They are known for their debauchery. The alcohol consumed in Guam is more than that which is consumed in New Orleans annually though the island has less than one tenth of the population. The alcohol issue is one that is found the world over, so it is not surprising it is found in the territory of Guam as well. This is not a reason to disown them, just unsettling fact.

Due to the native descent of the of these unruly sailors, the alcohol is usually illegally produced either on the island of Guam or on one of the neighboring islands. It is shipped between the various islands in the chain by many ships of uncouth pirates. These pirates are usually Chinese or Australian and speak in a tongue unintelligible to any cultured man. Their ships vary, peppered with Canadian or Spanish flags with no regard for the race aboard.

The waters surrounding Guam are teeming with these pirates. They are responsible for a reported 600 murders a year. The Australians are especially cruel. They are known for the torture Guamese women and children before their tied bodies are thrown overboard of the ships that they happened to be caught on. The pirates are responsible for much of the illegal gunrunning, drug-trafficking, immigrant transport and kidnapping that occurs within Mariana Islands.

The Territory of Guam is a hotbed for illegal immigrant transfer from the repressed area of South-East Asia to the fertile and welcoming shores of America. The Chinese pirates are much more interested in the money found in these actions than those pursued by the Australians. The immigrants are brought to America simply by loading them into empty shipping crates stopping at one of the many unguarded ports in Guam. Many of these immigrants are forced into a life of slavery and abuse once they reach their destinations.

An argument made for the maintaining of the Territory of Guam was made in 1972 by a French-Canadian priest, Robert Tredeux. He claimed that the territory could be useful for the production of new beaver fur caps, because of the numbers of imported beavers. The beaver was transplanted to the island in the 1800’s and flourished, due to the number of trees and lack of natural predators.

By 1912 the beaver numbers on the island were nearly parallel to those in the Appalachian Mountains of Eastern North America. By the 1970’s their numbers would exceed those of the Appalachian beaver. Although they have been hunted by the Native Chamorros since the 1960’s, the numbers are ever increasing. They are causing havoc in the rivers and rice plantations and are known to make their dams with the durable rubber tree. This is loved by the beavers, but cursed by the farmers. The dams cause much more flooding than dams created with wood-based trees.

The flooding caused by these dams has crippled the crops of rubber trees and oranges in recent years. This has caused more unemployment, leading to increasing pirate recruitment numbers and more native Guam residents to fall into the depressive states of alcoholism and unemployment. It is widely believed throughout Guam that these issues should be dealt with by an unappreciative foreign government. The apathetic way we have dealt with the issues of Guam has lead to political and social unrest.

Since the Chamorro uprising in 1900, there has been a cloud of descent hovering over the people of Guam. This despise for their colonial leaders is more prominent today than it ever has been. With the lack of policing the waters around the island, pirates have been able to heavily arm the native people of Guam with heavy artillery and automatic weapons. This unrest was most recently seen in a media-hidden riot two years ago.

Thirty members of the American military were struck down before we were able to stifle the violence. In all, about 300 people were killed. In the end, this has only added to the social unrest in Guam.

This claim should not be startling for Guam has a long history of social unrest. The Chamorro pirates once took the capital siege to install a totalitarian government. This was successful at first, but once our navy reached the Marianas Islands the few guns the people had were easily reduced. A law was passed in 2006 forbidding Chamarros of any age to own firearms. This has genuinely reduced the number of riots per year and the government fatalities have fallen tenfold.

The oranges and rubber that American ports in Guam are able to salvage is quickly shipped to the United States to be processed and sold in our form of choice. The oranges are often found on supermarket shelves in cans, under the guise of name brand produce. The rubber is mainly made in to roller blades, although when there are rubber shortages in other parts of the world tires are a popular substitute.

The shipping of small amounts of oranges and rubber is an utter waste of money. The costs of shipping from Guam are astronomical due to the lack of companies willing to send boats through the waters surrounding Guam. The resources would more safely be sent to China to be manufactured into useful products. They could then be shipped at minimal cost from China on the larger boats sent towards North America.

Finally, although the shipping crates are somewhat advanced, the goods are not always in good shape when they arrive in our ports. Guam is known for a strange yellow beetle that nests inside fruit while still on the tree. It does not change the shape, color or texture of the fruit it has invaded. They create dams in the holes they enter through, and the color of the hole blends with the fruit. They are unnoticed and free to lay their eggs and live in the fruit. They are relatively rare, but the infected fruit usually reaches American ports.

The beetles are separated from the majority of the fruit once they reach their destination. They quickly run out of juice within the orange and need to find a new host. This is usually the unknowing person who opens the infected fruit. At least one beetle will jump out and attach itself to a human. They quickly burrow into the skin of the victim. The beetles travel under the skin towards the face and once there they burrow through the eyes to the brain. Many food processors have died due to imported Guamese fruit. This must end if we want California to remain.

Guam is also a place of wide-open spaces and skies. That is why it may be better in the hands of an Asian nation, such as the Japanese. We own more than enough land. Our military is stretched thin. The budget should be better spent giving incompetent and retiring Navy veterans a pension instead of the salary they have for their illegitimate desk jobs. We need forces to protect us but an act like this fosters better relations with our friends in China. That is important in a small world like ours.


ലെറ്റര്‍ ആന്‍ഡ്‌ മ്യൂസിക്‌ contest

ഐ ഗോട്ട് എ ലെറ്റര്‍ അറ്റ്‌ മൈ യൌടുബെ. ഉസെര്നമേ ഈസ്‌ യ്നോര്ട്, ചെക്ക് ഫോര്‍ മുസികാല്‍ വിടെഒസ്.
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തെരെ ഈസ്‌ ആള്‍സോ സോമെതിംഗ് സില്ലി അഫൂറ്റ്‌ വിത്ത്‌ മൈ ത്രില്‍ ഓഫ് ലെട്ടെര്സ്... ദേ അപ്പീര്‍ ടോ ബി രേപ്രേസേന്റെദ്‌ ഇന്‍ ബിഅനരി. ഐ ഡോ നോട നോ ബൈനറി മൈസെല്‍ഫ്‌.